How To Find Motivation After The Loss Of A Loved One

Perhaps, one of the hardest things to do in life is finding motivation to move on after you lost someone you love. Losing someone who matters can bring heartache and pain, sleepless night, and not finding the courage to face life. When you’re hurt, you have the tendency to shut yourself down from the outside world. You lose interest in everything. You are no longer excited about waking up in the morning, and you’re feeling tired easily.

When you lost someone, whether by death, divorce or separation, the pain is unbearable. You feel like your chest continues to hurt and your tears just would not stop. No matter what your family and friends do to comfort you, it’s just so impossible to see hope.

Denial is the first thing that happens after losing a loved one. Maybe that person is someone who is part of your everyday life, or that person is someone that you share your dreams with. Now that person is not here, how will you go on?

 

Coping With the Death Of A Loved One

When someone you love unexpectedly died, it seems grieving is unending. It is difficult to accept that the person is no longer with you now. You have to accept that the person would no longer come back, no matter what you do.

After the denial process is over, the grieving process would soon be followed by acceptance. Here, you would start reviving the memories of your loved one as your coping mechanism. You would look at the photo albums, talk about your loved one with your friends and family, listen to the voice of your loved one on your phone, or watch videos.

 

Coping with Separation or Divorce

Coping with the loss of someone you loved could also happen with someone who is still existing, but you could no longer be together no matter what. In this case, you possibly had a divorce or you are now separated from your partner.
When a person chose to walk away from your life, coping up is more challenging. Aside from adjusting to the loss of that person, you have to deal with the negative emotion of stress, rejection, and isolation.

Perhaps, you would intend to patch up things and fight for your love. You would follow your loved one and ask for another chance. Probably, you would beg or insist that person to come back, or you would ask the help of your friends to intervene.

Indeed, dealing with the loss of your loved one is a hard thing to do. Whether it is through death or separation, healing takes a significant amount of time. It takes months, sometimes it can even take some years or even forever to finally accept it.

A person takes time to grieve. It couldn’t be forced or rushed. When the person is ready, healing would follow. After grieving, the person could start looking forward to finding hope and motivation to begin life.

Getting motivation would not be easy, but you have to help yourself and move on. If the source of your sorrow is a broken relationship, healing would be faster after you realized the benefits of not having that person anymore. Perhaps that person is a manipulative person who always treats you bad. Now, look how comfortable and peaceful your life would be without that person?

When it comes to moving on from the death of a loved one, it would be harder for the people who were left behind. However, in due time, realizing that the person is in a good place now, free from physical pain and sorrows, would help you accept it. Moving on takes time, patience and prayers.

 

10 Ways To Get Back To Life After The Loss Of A Loved One

A death in the family can be a life-changing experience. But life doesn’t stop after the departure of anyone and it has to move on. So if you feel shattered after the demise of a loved one, here are some of the tips that will help you get back to life:

  • Accept It As A Reality

Humans are mortal. We all have to bid farewell to this loved ones and leave this world forever. It is a transitional process and we have to accept it as a reality. While it is okay to grieve the loss of that special person for some time, occupying your mind with the sad thoughts will do not good. What you should do is consolidate yourself and be an emotional support to the other survivors.

  1. Surround Yourself With Your Support System

It is painful to live without someone you are fond of. At this time, you can draw emotional strength from your family. Your parents, kids, spouse, or friends can be your best support to help you come out of this ordeal. Therefore, you should call your parents and loved ones to join every time you miss that special person in your life.

  1. Meditate To Break Yourself Free From Intrusive Thoughts

The death of a loved one can be overwhelming and it is natural to get occupied by intrusive thoughts. At this juncture, you need to consolidate yourself and let the negative thoughts out of your mind and meditation helps you do that. So take out time to meditate at least once in a day and cleanse your mind from all the negative thoughts.

  1. Let Out Your Emotions

Holding your emotions can affect your wellbeing. So it is better to express yourself and vent out your feelings. The best way you can do this is by sobbing your heart out.

Find a picture of your loved one and let the tears flow. Similarly, you can get a souvenir that you can talk to console yourself. You can even visit the graveyard of your loved one to find solace.

  1. Keep Moving On

Life is unpredictable. There are events in life that jolt you and turn your life upside down and the death of a loved one is one such event. But life has to move on and you have many other reasons to live for. It could be your kids who need your love and attention. It could be your passion that you always wanted to pursue or it could be a noble mission that you pledged.

When you have a meaningful purpose, you can start your life all over again. So find your purpose and work towards its completion.

  1. Take Care Of Your Health

The death of a loved one can have effects on your mood. It is natural to not feel hungry or motivated to hit the gym. But if you make it your habit then it can have an impact on your health and wellbeing. To cope with it, you need to make some efforts.

While it will be difficult for you to eat when you don’t have the hunger pangs, you have to force yourself to do this. Similarly, you will not want to hit the gym but you have to take yourself out of your room and lift the dumbbells. You can start with baby steps by taking small portions of the meal or giving less time to work out and increase it as you start feeling the buzz.

 

  1. Reconnect To Life

When there is a death in your family, you might miss that thrill that kept you going in life. To get that spark back, you have to stand up to the grief and start over again. You can get out of this state only when you get back to your life.

So snap out of the sad thoughts and embrace life again. Get your iPod and listen to your playlist or go out to the movies and watch one of your favourite films. Spending time with your besties will help you feel better. All these things will help you reconnect with life.

  1. Don’t Be Self-Conscious

Everyone has their own way of grieving the death of a close relative. Some cry out their grief, while some internalize their feelings. There is nothing wrong in either way and you can choose to emote your feelings the way you want. What people are going to think should not define how you should mourn the demise of your loved one. Your love for that special person will remain the same no matter how you lament your pain.

  1. Go Out Of City

When someone dies in your family, it becomes difficult to get your attention out of that person. Even when you want to divert your attention, the people and surrounding keep reminding you of that person.

If the memories of the loved one keep haunting you then it is better to leave the city for some time. Once you feel better, you can come back to your hometown. Besides, you can explore new things in a new place that will help you keep busy.

  1. Channel Your Grief Into Something Positive And Meaningful

When a tragedy hits you, it leaves you with two options: either you give up and let the pain become part of your being or you seek it as a motivation to achieve something bigger. Similarly, you can find a positive dimension of life in this time of grief.

Let’s say you’ve lost your kid. You had dreamt bigger for him and wanted him to excel in his studies. But your dream doesn’t die here. You can still live your dream as you can adopt an orphan and give him your surname. You can become his custodian and guardian and give him an education. This will not only help you fill the vacuum created by the death of your kid but will also contribute to the betterment of the society.

  1. Dedicate Yourself To Fulfill The Wish Of Your Lost Fellow

Every individual has some aspirations. Some are able to achieve them, while some are not that lucky. By fulfilling the dream of your loved one, you will not only keep him alive but also give a meaning to your life. Nothing can be more motivational for you than realizing the dream of someone you love so much.

Losing a loved one can be a traumatic experience. But positive things in life can heal the worst of the wounds. So don’t hold back yourself and let the life does it magic on you. You will come out as a better and strong person.

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Last modified on Saturday, 07 November 2020 14:32

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